Thursday, July 16, 2009

New Zealand News

so you finally realize how small and well, kinda pathetic New Zealand is, when the only main topic of news, on the national news, is the fight between chocolate brands. "oh well let's just grab another cup of coffee and dispute this HUGE CRISIS! who will win the battle? you will find out, tonight at ten." that ladies and gentlemen, is the large argument taking place in this beautiful, small, remote, and ever so slightly pathetic country. god save me now!

Monday, July 13, 2009

window watcher

ok so i will admit it. but i am a people watcher. you see the houses surrounding my apartment are very close together, which makes it quite easy to just see other people in their houses, and kinda creepily watch them. i do realize this sounds rather like a stalker, and yes i do kinda believe i am then, but anyways, as i sit here waiting for one of my favorite shows to come on, i look out the window to my left and see a man making odd body gestures, it looks to me as if he's practicing tennis or so, without a racket or the wii, or any sort of equipment. to me it was quite entertaining just sitting here for a good 15 minutes or so watching this man in his late 30's, flailing around his apartment, then would get frustrated, jump up and down yelling (or so i would imagine by his body gestures, though i cannot hear him). and then he would simply continue with his "workout". he is gone now, however, i do believe that within the next 30 minutes or so he will be back. i will keep you posted as to whether this amounts to anything or not.

pessimistic optimist?

ok so i do realize that many of you have either heard this before, used it yourself, have absolutely no idea what it means, or are just briefly understand its principals. well i myself am, oddly enough, a pessimistic optimist. because despite how perky and upbeat i can be and generally am, i do in fact always have that doubt about my situations or actions. even if it is something that i have come up with to do, i will, more typically than not, attempt to talk others out of it, in fear of it being stupid, lame, dangerous, or just plain horrendous and not going to work at all. i doubt myself a lot, and this has made some aspects of my life worse through relationships, friendships, and even as simply as school. however, i believe also that through my optimism and highly perky nature, that i can and do quite often as of lately, choose to be optimistic. granted all one can hope for is for good things to happen in such a crappy situation as i have previously spoke about. my general ficade is that i am a happy, go-lucky person. this can be good or bad dependant on the situation. i mean i love being happy 83% of the time, however this also makes it problematic because then people do not think of me as ever being able to be upset, and if so then how are they to know? well. typically they don't. you see i'm always there for my friends whether its 3 in the morning or 1 in the afternoon, i will always be there for a shoulder to cry on and a hand to grad a bottle and smack the jerk over the head who broke her heart. but then comes the problem when i'm hurt is that i do not like to talk about my "feelings". its never been an issue for me and in recent events such as the move, one break up, one really hard good-bye, and then good-bye to all my friends, i do not have anyone to turn to to comfort me. i only have me. i mean my sisters here with me for only another month, but she's so wrapped up in her own long distance relationship and how hard it is and how she misses them. but you see she's only gone for a month. i'm gone for good and have the same problems as her. but all she does is sit in her room, go on her laptop, and emerge when its dinner. that's the support i have here. i realize that this may come across as complaining, and whiny, but you know what its my blog. i can complain here if i want : ). so all i'm trying to say is that when i finally have reason to get out of this apartment, i will be writing things that are confusing and probably don't make any sense to the average person reading this because it will be so two sided and confusing and for that i apologize dearly.

Video messages

ok. so this post is going to be about today, obviously, due to my title. well today i haven't really done much considering I'm not in school yet and i don't know anyone and my typically anti-social sister now has a job where she is being paid $12 an hour. lucky. but so yeah now when she's at work i am able to use her computer because mine has not yet arrived. (fingers crossed for end of the week). so this blog is about video messaging. i will openly admit my addiction to facebook. it is a horrible thing and i truly try to not be so reliable on it, but it is hard due to my recent move and no other form of connection with my American friends. so as i was saying is that i have now discovered video posts on facebook using my sisters web cam. i adore this. not only is it truly entertaining to talk to yourself, and see your self while doing it, but you get to communicate with someone in a way other than writing a wall post, which has no form of expression or personal contact. so today, i have been experimenting with video posting, with little success i might add. you see i do not know the reason for this, however, when i post a video the sound works, however, you can only see snipits of me, and it does not stream nicely and fully. (if you have any tips let me know). so i was leaving videos all over my friends walls on facebook and feeling pretty good about myself in the process. well, my reason for posting this as a blog, despite the fact that i wanted to encourage all you readers to do this yourselves, is that it had me talking to my ex. now you do not know the story with him and i will not get into full details because i do not, in case he were to read this, want him to feel awkward or violated in any way. i will leave it at us having a bad break-up and not speaking for the past few months. well, today i was speaking with him on facebook chat (also a handy tool: P ) and so this lead to me leaving a video on his wall and my previous friend karl. well apparently my ex was with karl and karl has this AMAZING thing called skype (i recommend you get it right away) well i do as well for it allows me to stay in contact with my "mancandy" back home (i put it in quotes because i do not know for sure what we are). well i was talking to him and karl on skype and it was nice because i missed talking to him. and i do realize that i sound so stereotypical girly right now all "aw i missed him and it was soo nice and omg like wow" but that is not my intention and i apologize if i do come across as that. so yeah that was really nice. and CONGRATULATIONS to his mum who is getting married this weekend!!! a big congrats goes out to her and her fiance, the lucky man who caught her eye. (treat her well she is an amazing woman!) : ). but yeah. so that's a quick note i had to add in. so i also wanted to add for all of you to check out their music that they make themselves on myspace. (my ex and Karl) i tell you this because they are playing at his mothers wedding which is incredibly sweet and a round of applause goes out to them. so check them out and to do so click here


these are some of my favorite quotes, enjoy!

Today I begin to understand what love must be, if it exists... When we are parted, we each feel the lack of the other half of ourselves. We are incomplete like a book in two volumes of which the first has been lost. That is what I imagine love to be: incompleteness in absence.

"There's no poetry between us"
Said the paper to the pen
"And I get nothing for my trouble
But the ink beneath my skin"
no poetry~ Gary Jules

"Knock on the sky and listen to the sound"

Alice came to a fork in the road. "Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."
~Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

It takes all the running you can do just to keep in the same place. ~Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking-Glass

"They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. well that's too bad because my heart can't grow anymore for you. so no absence needed."

Friday, July 10, 2009

the intro: obviously

so this is my blog. as you can tell. i mean i don't know how many of you are actually reading this now, or if none of you are. then OK. i suppose I'm mostly writing this for me. because well i recently moved to New Zealand from New Jersey. yeah big change i know. i have lived here before though. i have moved approximately well 1) i was born in America, New Jersey 2) moved to Holland when i was 2 3) moved to New Zealand when i was 4, but to Hamilton, 4) when i was about 7 i suppose, i moved to Kapiti, also located in New Zealand, 5) when i was about 10 i moved back to New Jersey, just to finish off the end of 4th grade. and number 6) i just moved back to New Zealand about 2 weeks ago, and am now 17. so that's my background. I'm white, Caucasian, though no one believes that because i am in fact really tan, so people often think of me as Hispanic or Filipino, however i have just about the whitest heritage. i am a bit German, British, Dutch, American (if that counts as a nationality) but yeah i think that's about it. so yeah that's my heritage. my favorite colours green. my favorite food is sushi. my favorite candy is peanut chews. my favorite flower is the orchid. my favorite movie is pulp fiction. my favorite TV show is the office (American version) i like the original one (the British one) however, i just haven't watched it enough. ummmm. I'm trying to think of what else to tell you about me. P.S. I'm going to make this blog as honest as possible to if there is anything you want to know then please feel free to ask. i will answer honestly. oh so yeah this blog is mostly going to be about cool websites I've found. recent events in my life. and advice for any of you reading this. : D I'm actually really good at advice. which you may or may not believe. but i am . so feel free to ask and i will try my best to help because, as you probably have heard before from a movie or something, if i don't know the answer i will try to find it somewhere else. but i do have a lot of life experience for only being 17. so i can most likely relate to you really well. so i guess this is my intro. i may post another one later just because I'm that bored and its currently raining so i don't really have anything else to do. so welcome! again. and enjoy my page <3